obama sings exeivite order over april fools jokes make him look dumb

Obama Bans Practical Jokes After April Fool’s Day Harassment

(PP)- President Barack Hussein Obama once again squashed American’s first amendment right of free speech by issuing an executive order banning all practical jokes in and around the White House on April 1st, also known as April Fool’s Day.
In trying to maintain his false image of being the calm, cool and collected leader of the free world, President Obama clamped down on staff members and massive federal government agencies exposing him as a gullible dunderhead, and an easy mark for even the most obvious and childish prank.
“The first four April Fool’s Days at the White House were brutal on the President, especially in the Oval Office,” said a former Secretary of State. “Last year a five year old son of one of Michelle’s 108 assistants put a “Wet Paint” sign on his chair, and the President had to stand up all day. After he figured it out, Obama sat down on a whoopee cushion during a meeting with Queen Elizabeth which was quite embarrassing for ‘Mr. Suave’ who was so startled that he nearly wet his pants.”
Several of the President’s federal co-workers expressed their discontent with Obama’s infringement on free speech because April Fool’s Day has been the only time any federal employee could get away with showing their true feelings about the thin skinned President and his radical left wing policies.
“Most IRS agents are very upset with Obama because he has them chasing down little girls trying to collect the taxes on their babysitting money,” said one IRS bag man. “Nobody likes looking like a jerk just because he follows the bosses orders, so when IRS agents sent Obama over a million letters on April Fool’s Day saying he is being audited, well… that gave them an opportunity to blow off some steam.”
Surprisingly, Republicans and conservatives have been shy about playing tricks on Mr. Obama for April Fool’s Day, believing they would appear mean spirited to low information voters that see any attack on Obama as being racist.
“During Obama’s first year in the White House, Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas had an assistant place a Diet Coke can with a short curly hair on it inside Air Force One,” said a secret service agent. “Well, the First Lady found it and went all Anita Hill on the President right in front of Chris Matthews from MSNBC. Since then, Matthews reports any attack on Obama as racist even though it was just a black-on-black prank gone awry.”
The Palookaville Post has learned that prior to the executive order banning pranks on the President, several staffers were planning extravagant hoaxes during the annual White House Easter Egg Hunt, one of which was to have former California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger dress up as the Easter Bunny and challenge Obama to an arm wrestling contest which the President would of course lose. The prank was not meant to be funny, but intended to expose Obama as the weak leader that he is.
Ace Cub Reporter Jimmy Olsentwins