An EPIC Apology Letter to Obama Goes Viral Around the Web
This has to be one of the best I’ve seen in a while. Matt Walsh who runs
blog,
wrote this letter to Barack Hussein Obama yesterday in response mainly
to the rodeo clown in Missouri and how he is very sorry that it must
have hurt his feelings. Hope you find it as amusing as we did here at
The Free Patriot:
Dear President Obama,
I’m reaching out to you as a friend. I know you must be deeply
hurting after what happened at the Missouri State Fair. Sure, you
probably try to avoid watching the news while you’re on vacation, but
I’m sure the pilot who airlifted your dog to your rental mansion in
Martha’s Vineyard probably caught you up to speed (that guy is such a
chatterbox). Your jaw must have hit the floor when you heard the news: A
rodeo clown in Missouri poked fun at you. Yeah, I know, almost
impossible to believe. The gall! The gumption! The racism! Don’t worry,
the entire country erupted in outrage, Democrats and Republicans issued
statements of condemnation, and now the offending clown has been banned
for life from the Missouri State Fair. There will likely be “action
taken” against the Missouri Rodeo Clown Association, and I do hope
justice is visited upon them swiftly. I think we’re all a little sick of
the Missouri Rodeo Clown Association causing trouble. It’s something
new every week with those freakin’ guys.
But all of this is of no consolation. The fact is, a rodeo clown in
Missouri made fun of you. Nothing can ever ease the pain he has caused.
This sort of crass lampooning of public officials has never happened at a
rodeo until now, and I know that because a bunch of people who have
never been within 150 miles of a rodeo said so. And then — worse still —
the crowd erupted in applause at the spectacle of a guy in an Obama
mask being chased by a rampaging bull. Racists, the lot of ‘em! I mean,
Bush never got this sort of treatment. Nobody ever mocked or satirized
him. No crude jokes were told about him. Nobody ever wished violence or
death upon him. Ever. You know why? Because he’s white. White presidents
always get treated nicely, especially white Republicans. Just ask
Lincoln. The whole country agreed for over two centuries that we don’t
ever insult presidents, then you get into office and all of a sudden
every day is Pick on the President Day. Outrageous!
Besides, you are due some respect. You’ve earned it. You’ve done
nothing but serve these people and make their lives better, and this is
how they treat you? Ungrateful brats. You should drone bomb these
haters. Just kidding. But seriously, you should. You’re the first
president in history to actually order the assassination of American
citizens, and I say why stop with some Muslim propagandist and his
completely innocent son who never committed any crime at all?
I’m especially sick of these punks in the middle class who won’t stop
complaining about you. What’s their issue? OK, you haven’t done
anything about the unemployment rate your whole time in office, median
household incomes have dropped, less businesses are opening, the number
of people in poverty has increased while the number of high paying jobs
has decreased, all of this while taxes go up and Obamacare looms,
threatening to strangle small business owners and put thousands more out
of work, but so what? I’ve got two words: Food stamps. Or is it
foodstamps? I don’t know, I can’t spell it, I can just use it to get my
Lucky Charms and Dr. Pepper. You’ve made all of this “work” crap
obsolete by increasing the entitlement state more than any president
ever in history! You’re adding more than 11 thousand Americans a day to
SNAP. You’ve got millions relying on the government for rent, cable,
phone, even birth control. I guess this horrible economy stuff would be
kind of a bummer if not for all the delicious welfare. Who needs an
economy anymore? We’ve got you, baby.
So how could anyone be upset at you? How could they delight at the
degradation and mockery of Barack Obama? What’s wrong with these right
wing rednecks? Are they still sore about the whole thing where you sent
the IRS after your political opponents to harass and hinder them during
an election cycle? Or the stuff about spying on the phone records of
every American? What about all this business about you arming and
funding Islamic Militants overseas and then orchestrating a coverup when
a bunch of them murdered your ambassador? Are folks STILL mad that you
funneled weapons to drug cartels and then threatened whistleblowers into
silence? Or is it all this fuss over your Justice Department spying on
and attempting to prosecute journalists? Is it the wildly unpopular two
thousand page health care law? The regulation mandating that religious
employers provide abortifacients to their employees? The millions of tax
dollars you’ve given to the abortion industry and the blessings you
wished upon a group of wealthy abortionists? The bailouts? The green
energy scams? The massive expansion of government? The out of control
deficit spending? The lies? The broken promises? The betrayals? The
corruption? The attacks on our fundamental liberties?
I can’t imagine why anyone would get too worked about any of that.
Like you said, that stuff didn’t happen. Or it did, but it’s not a big
deal. Or it’s not a big deal because it didn’t. I can’t remember, I just
know that you treat anyone who raises any of these concerns with utter
contempt and disregard, which clearly proves that they are wrong.
Mr. Obama, IF you WERE actually guilty of being a deceitful despot
who murders, conspires, and steals, then obviously all true Americans
would have no choice but to giggle with glee at the sight of your
likeness being gouged by an angry bull. Fortunately, that isn’t the
case, which is why I’d like to apologize on for the entire state of
Missouri, for everyone who has ever attended a state fair, and for
everyone in the rodeo clown community.
You are still special, and I still love you.
Yours eternally,
Matt Walsh
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